CHICKEN FIGHTS BACK
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ATLANTA (UPI) Chicken, the species, has appearantly
taken matters into it's own collective beak on Saturday,
after hundreds of centuries of playing bitch to Mankind.

The uproarious counter-assault began near here, in rural
Pigballs, Georgia, when a 4lb hen ready for slaughter
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plucked the eyes out of yard handler Rufus McCoy,
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thus igniting a riot amidst the rank of the poultry,
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and creating a virtual death-trap for the 17-person
meat and poultry processing and packing plant;
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only Helga Ruteberger escaped being de-fleshed,
by cleverly disguising herself as another chicken.
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The carnage soon spread to other farms, then other counties,
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and is now considered an intra-state threat
to meat processors and packers everywhere;

however, authorities are preparing to declare a
state of emergency, as it has now been learned that
a full-frontal assault on humanity has been planned
by several chickens underground for over 3 years.

The government fears that the so-called "Organic" breeding
of chickens has caused a feral mutation in both the Cerebral
Cortex and Medula Oblongata of the affected birds, who
have now risen up as leaders of a Fowl Revolution.

see you next week.
last week's Big Blog

ATLANTA (UPI) Chicken, the species, has appearantly
taken matters into it's own collective beak on Saturday,
after hundreds of centuries of playing bitch to Mankind.

The uproarious counter-assault began near here, in rural
Pigballs, Georgia, when a 4lb hen ready for slaughter

plucked the eyes out of yard handler Rufus McCoy,

thus igniting a riot amidst the rank of the poultry,

and creating a virtual death-trap for the 17-person
meat and poultry processing and packing plant;

only Helga Ruteberger escaped being de-fleshed,
by cleverly disguising herself as another chicken.

The carnage soon spread to other farms, then other counties,

and is now considered an intra-state threat
to meat processors and packers everywhere;

however, authorities are preparing to declare a
state of emergency, as it has now been learned that
a full-frontal assault on humanity has been planned
by several chickens underground for over 3 years.

The government fears that the so-called "Organic" breeding
of chickens has caused a feral mutation in both the Cerebral
Cortex and Medula Oblongata of the affected birds, who
have now risen up as leaders of a Fowl Revolution.

see you next week.
last week's Big Blog

ATLANTA (UPI) Chicken, the species, has appearantly
taken matters into it's own collective beak on Saturday,
after hundreds of centuries of playing bitch to Mankind.

The uproarious counter-assault began near here, in rural
Pigballs, Georgia, when a 4lb hen ready for slaughter

plucked the eyes out of yard handler Rufus McCoy,

thus igniting a riot amidst the rank of the poultry,

and creating a virtual death-trap for the 17-person
meat and poultry processing and packing plant;

only Helga Ruteberger escaped being de-fleshed,
by cleverly disguising herself as another chicken.

The carnage soon spread to other farms, then other counties,

and is now considered an intra-state threat
to meat processors and packers everywhere;

however, authorities are preparing to declare a
state of emergency, as it has now been learned that
a full-frontal assault on humanity has been planned
by several chickens underground for over 3 years.

The government fears that the so-called "Organic" breeding
of chickens has caused a feral mutation in both the Cerebral
Cortex and Medula Oblongata of the affected birds, who
have now risen up as leaders of a Fowl Revolution.

see you next week.
last week's Big Blog
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