WELCOME TO BEIJING
LET THE GAMES BEGIN
well, it's 2008, and that mean Olympics, boys and girls! Boyo! just
never you mind all that barbed wire, up top, there. forget all about
the lung-closing Smog that that shit-hole Beijing has become... and
don't pay any attention to all the Political Murder in the Name of the
State that's gone on ever since old Mao was knee-high to a Chinese
Grasshopper. you know, there's a ton of fun and wacky stuff at the
Olympics, oh, yeah! say, ya know, I sent a letter to the International
Olympic Committee a while back, and I had some ideas for some great
new events, but the fucking bastards wouldn't listen. those fucks...
... that said, though, hey, I thought I was onto some real winners, ya
know it? so, I just kinda figured I'd go on and share 'em with all of you
this Sunday. come on... grab an Egg Roll, and let's go for a little scroll, eh?
ya gotta love them opening ceremonies, huh?
here's a good one. Free-Style Ball Buster. the IOC didn't go for it...
... but, for some reason, they allowed this guy
to dress up like a Penguin. that's fucked up...
... ya know, I think he boffed 'em out back...
... they didn't like the Barbied Wire Long Jump, either...
Ballerina Biathlon. ready, aim, pirouette. didn't go, though...
... even though they considered this guy for a Mascot...
... I tried to get them to change the Wrestling events from
the Roman-Greco to the newer Nacho Libre. it's a No Go...
... hey, they did take a look at Chubbs Mini-Putt Olympic Golf...
... but, the 400 Kilo Water Displacement Diving was ruled out...
... as was Shark Obstacle Marathon Breaststroke, which I found
odd, because they LOVE swimming at the Summer Games...
... I tried to get 'em to bring back the Javelin Catch, too.
the filthy bastards weren't interested, though. fuckers...
... Midget Hoops. blatantly given the cold shoulder...
... as was this one, Heisman Keep-Away. they got no taste...
... and neither does this guy, after a game of Face Bash...
... which was rejected, along with Olympic Spot the Looney...
... and this... Olympic Elephant Polo... any questions...?
that's right. Olympic Twat Baton.
shot down in flames, my friends...
... so, I'm not going. seems to me that it'd be just like
puking out a shit-load of money... and who needs that?
see ya next week...
last week's Big Blog
LET THE GAMES BEGIN
well, it's 2008, and that mean Olympics, boys and girls! Boyo! just
never you mind all that barbed wire, up top, there. forget all about
the lung-closing Smog that that shit-hole Beijing has become... and
don't pay any attention to all the Political Murder in the Name of the
State that's gone on ever since old Mao was knee-high to a Chinese
Grasshopper. you know, there's a ton of fun and wacky stuff at the
Olympics, oh, yeah! say, ya know, I sent a letter to the International
Olympic Committee a while back, and I had some ideas for some great
new events, but the fucking bastards wouldn't listen. those fucks...
... that said, though, hey, I thought I was onto some real winners, ya
know it? so, I just kinda figured I'd go on and share 'em with all of you
this Sunday. come on... grab an Egg Roll, and let's go for a little scroll, eh?
ya gotta love them opening ceremonies, huh?
here's a good one. Free-Style Ball Buster. the IOC didn't go for it...
... but, for some reason, they allowed this guy
to dress up like a Penguin. that's fucked up...
... ya know, I think he boffed 'em out back...
... they didn't like the Barbied Wire Long Jump, either...
Ballerina Biathlon. ready, aim, pirouette. didn't go, though...
... even though they considered this guy for a Mascot...
... I tried to get them to change the Wrestling events from
the Roman-Greco to the newer Nacho Libre. it's a No Go...
... hey, they did take a look at Chubbs Mini-Putt Olympic Golf...
... but, the 400 Kilo Water Displacement Diving was ruled out...
... as was Shark Obstacle Marathon Breaststroke, which I found
odd, because they LOVE swimming at the Summer Games...
... I tried to get 'em to bring back the Javelin Catch, too.
the filthy bastards weren't interested, though. fuckers...
... Midget Hoops. blatantly given the cold shoulder...
... as was this one, Heisman Keep-Away. they got no taste...
... and neither does this guy, after a game of Face Bash...
... which was rejected, along with Olympic Spot the Looney...
... and this... Olympic Elephant Polo... any questions...?
that's right. Olympic Twat Baton.
shot down in flames, my friends...
... so, I'm not going. seems to me that it'd be just like
puking out a shit-load of money... and who needs that?
see ya next week...
last week's Big Blog
LET THE GAMES BEGIN
well, it's 2008, and that mean Olympics, boys and girls! Boyo! just
never you mind all that barbed wire, up top, there. forget all about
the lung-closing Smog that that shit-hole Beijing has become... and
don't pay any attention to all the Political Murder in the Name of the
State that's gone on ever since old Mao was knee-high to a Chinese
Grasshopper. you know, there's a ton of fun and wacky stuff at the
Olympics, oh, yeah! say, ya know, I sent a letter to the International
Olympic Committee a while back, and I had some ideas for some great
new events, but the fucking bastards wouldn't listen. those fucks...
... that said, though, hey, I thought I was onto some real winners, ya
know it? so, I just kinda figured I'd go on and share 'em with all of you
this Sunday. come on... grab an Egg Roll, and let's go for a little scroll, eh?
ya gotta love them opening ceremonies, huh?
here's a good one. Free-Style Ball Buster. the IOC didn't go for it...
... but, for some reason, they allowed this guy
to dress up like a Penguin. that's fucked up...
... ya know, I think he boffed 'em out back...
... they didn't like the Barbied Wire Long Jump, either...
Ballerina Biathlon. ready, aim, pirouette. didn't go, though...
... even though they considered this guy for a Mascot...
... I tried to get them to change the Wrestling events from
the Roman-Greco to the newer Nacho Libre. it's a No Go...
... hey, they did take a look at Chubbs Mini-Putt Olympic Golf...
... but, the 400 Kilo Water Displacement Diving was ruled out...
... as was Shark Obstacle Marathon Breaststroke, which I found
odd, because they LOVE swimming at the Summer Games...
... I tried to get 'em to bring back the Javelin Catch, too.
the filthy bastards weren't interested, though. fuckers...
... Midget Hoops. blatantly given the cold shoulder...
... as was this one, Heisman Keep-Away. they got no taste...
... and neither does this guy, after a game of Face Bash...
... which was rejected, along with Olympic Spot the Looney...
... and this... Olympic Elephant Polo... any questions...?
that's right. Olympic Twat Baton.
shot down in flames, my friends...
... so, I'm not going. seems to me that it'd be just like
puking out a shit-load of money... and who needs that?
see ya next week...
last week's Big Blog
expunged by doctor chip @ 1:15 PM
1 Comments:
Nothing less than I would expect from the ever-insightful Doctor: a shitload o' shtein... and every turd: right fucking on!
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